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Friday, October 1, 2010

One Hundred and Seventy-one

If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us. - Hermann Hesse

The inward looking direction of my training forces me to see myself as I am, stripping away the garb of ego that I use to present an image of myself to the world instead of who I really am. The process of finding myself has been long, difficult and on-going. I suppose, since I am continually changing, finding new and inventive ways to hide myself, the journey will never end. I can approach myself without limit, but due to the unflagging efforts of my ego, never quite reach me. There'll always be another layer of self protection (or should I say delusion?) to peel away.

When I encounter someone I don't like I ask myself what is it about me that I see reflected in him? Then, as I continue to train, I can meditate on the answer and so, hopefully, eventually arrive at an understanding as to what it is about me that I don't like and change it.

I can take Hesse's quote and turn it around to read:

If you like a person, you like something in him that is part of yourself. We like that part of ourselves that doesn't disturb us.

Finding the parts of myself that I like, by seeing them reflected in the people I train with and interact with in the world, and letting them flourish is also an important part of my training. In this way, purging the negative while nurturing the positive, I continue to grow.

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